Blackjack

Your hand was a full house when all I had was a flush of spades with an ace
that I hoped would be my saving grace in this never ending game you constantly put
on hold for your enjoyment and for my torment. You
dealt me a handful of jokers when all the while the only joke was you.
That poker face showed
that this fifty-two card pick up wasn’t thought through
and I wondered time and time again of what could’ve been and if you only knew.
I folded those thoughts and tucked them away
as I turned the game and made it my own. I twirled
my skirt and found myself picking up the pieces of a new pattern,
a lifestyle that only had one suit,
one focus,
one truth
that fit. That among
the diamonds that cut my vulnerability to the core I will remain
as the queen of hearts with no bluff, no clubs, or bullshit. I will remain
and continue to watch the stakes rise until someone is brave enough to say,
“I’m all in.
Stay.”
But even then My heart will remain
to be treated like a queen by none other than yours truly as I double down on
the courage to love
yesterday,
today,
and our future in the shuffle.

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